Romantically speaking, school days are a mess. I mean, they were for me, at any rate. Perhaps others found a partner and treated them right and chastely dated between the years of 14 and 16, and now can look back with nostalgic affection at those far off days. That wasn’t me, and as far as I can remember it wasn’t anyone else I knew either.
So Valentine’s Day for the unattached teenager takes on a nightmarish dimension, only mitigated by the convention of anonymity. I think I’m right in saying I never received one legitimate (i.e. not an obvious joke) Valentine as a teenager. And you can laugh all you like at Valentine’s Day commercialism, but it would also be nice to catch someone’s gaze.
There are Valentine’s Day movies – I expect. I haven’t seen any. But there aren’t many songs about Valentine’s Day; just a handful. Which is odd, given its subject matter. I have however tracked down a Valentine’s Day song (included on the episode) which anatomises the grisly reality of teenage Valentinedom. Well done, Pedro the Lion.
Own Valentine
Found a new companion
But I couldn't read the signs
Carnations and chocolate
For my first real valentine
Making her feel awful
For her plan to break it off
I knew I could shield her from hard feelings
If I could abandon mine
Passed her a note in history
Through her best friend by her side
You can't help not liking me
I let her off the hook
Expertly erasing
How badly shook I was
Cause something heavy
Wouldn't let me
Be my own valentine
Always on the TV
A better way to be me
Hoping someone finally sees
Well how about that best friend
Who sees me being sweet
The scorned flowers and candy
She's delighted to redeem
While the one who loves me waits
Withering inside
Quieter than ever now
Unseen, languishing
While I chase anyone
Who even looks at me
Cause something heavy
Won't let me
Be my own valentine
Tracklist:
New rose, The Damned
Feeling called love, Wire
Happy Valentine’s Day, Outkast
My funny Valentine, Elvis Costello
Own Valentine, Pedro the Lion
Archie, marry me, Alvvays
Girl from Mars, Ash
You you you you you, The 6ths
Anyone else but you, The Moldy Peaches
Alison’s starting to happen, The Lemonheads
Something changed, Pulp
In power we trust the love advocated, Dead Can Dance
Punk rock girl, The Dead Milkmen
The last beat of my heart, Siouxsie and the Banshees
Guess how much I love you, The Lucksmiths
Passenger seat, Death Cab for Cutie